things I don't understand

When you are best friends with someone since birth,

the closeness that you have can not be understood by others.

they don't understand why you are at the hospital for every birth...

they don't understand why you drive out of town for a grandparents funeral

they don't understand that with one phone call in the middle of the night - you are there.



I've really stopped trying to explain how close we are to people.

It frustrates me when they don't "get it"

that I prefer these 3 best friends to some of my siblings!

That they are the family I CHOOSE....



So as I sit here making a meal to take to her husband tonight

fighting back tears and wondering if he's even going to be able to eat....

I'm praying this word over and over again "benign. benign. benign."

The amount of things that I need to pray for seem overwhelming

and because I know God knows my heart - I just repeat "benign."



There is nothing right about a 2 year old being in surgery.

there is nothing right about visiting my friend at the hospital

when there isn't a baby being born.

I knew we would face continued trials in our future as we have in our past-

deaths, sickness, maybe even cancer....just not this way, Lord.



benign. benign. benign.